my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
Randomize