how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize