Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize
