I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
