last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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