mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Moan for me like Helen Keller
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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