You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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