I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Randomize
