I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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