I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
