I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Randomize
