is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
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