He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
