What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
Randomize
