so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Randomize
