I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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