If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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