Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize
