So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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