FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
