you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Randomize
