Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Randomize
