Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Drunk is not a location!
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