All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
