Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Randomize
