Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
