The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Randomize
