Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
