Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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