You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
you win again, gameday.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Randomize
