guys are not supposed to queef...right?
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
We are all done wearing pants today
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Randomize
