You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Rumble strips road head = magical
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize
