You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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