Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
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