Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
