my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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