i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
