the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
