Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
