Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
I'm way too hungover for life right now
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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