garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Your face is a jimmy john
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
