quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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