i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
she looked like the before picture.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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