I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
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