Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize