just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
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