is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
how do you play pong handcuffed?
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize