its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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