I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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