It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
I'm really busy with my period
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