I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Randomize
