we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
